We Are Adult Survivors of Child Abuse and Neglect

One of the most pervasive forms of abuse at home is husbands and intimate partners beating up their wives and female partners. The vast majority of partner abuse is perpetrated by men. What makes it even worse is that these male bashers include in their repertoire controlling behaviors such as:[1]

• Isolating a woman from family and friends,
• Monitoring her movements, and
• Restricting her access to resources.

This is nothing new. All over the world, men still, in the 21^st century, believe that they have the right to control their wives’ behavior and that women who challenge that right – even by asking for household money or by expressing the need to help their children – open themselves up for further punishment. 

It is well documented in history, worldwide, that men believed they had the supreme right and duty to monitor and control their wives’ behavior in every way. Women were expected to tend to the household, mind the children, and always show their husbands obedience and respect. They still do in too many homes. And if sexual advances were refused, men had/have no problem with beating their wives to teach them a lesson.  

It doesn’t stop there. Much sexual coercion takes place against children or adolescents. During childhood, young girls/boys can become easy targets for older male relatives or friends who obtain sex through force or deception.  Later, boyfriends, teachers, relatives, or other men in authority may force young women/men into unwanted sexual encounters.

Until there is a meaningful national discussion on this topic, nothing is going to change. I do my part by at least writing about it on my website. I would love to hear how others feel.

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[1] “Intimate Partner Abuse,” Center for Health and Gender Equity, December 1999